Inconsequential Chat
Meaning of life questions!
It's almost 2023, I'm tired and worn out, and I still have so many unanswered questions!!
I haven’t found out who let the dogs out. Where’s the beef? How to get to Sesame Street, and why Dora doesn’t just use Google Maps. Why do all the flavours of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or why eggs are packaged in a flimsy carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that’s tough as nails?
Why “abbreviated” is such a long word; or why is there a D in ‘fridge’ but not in refrigerator. Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons. Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections... and, why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny going to? Why do The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Did you just try to sing those two previous songs? Just what exactly is Victoria’s secret, and where is Waldo?
(Author unknown)
The Night Before Christmas in Aussie land
'Twas the night before Christmas; there wasn't a sound.
Not a possum was stirring; no-one was around.
We'd left on the table some tucker and beer,
Hoping that Santa Claus soon would be here.
We children were snuggled up safe in our beds,
While dreams of pavlova danced 'round in our heads;
And Mum in her nightie, and Dad in his shorts,
Had just settled down to watch TV sports.
When outside the house a mad ruckus arose;
Loud squeaking and banging woke us from our doze.
We ran to the screen door, peeked cautiously out,
snuck onto the deck, then let out a shout.
Guess what had woken us up from our snooze?
But a rusty old Ute pulled by six mighty 'roos.
The cheerful man driving was giggling with glee.
And we both knew at once who this plump bloke must be.
Now, I'm telling the truth it's all dinki-di,
Those six white boomers fairly soared through the sky.
Santa leaned out the window to pull at the reins,
And encouraged the boomers, by calling their names.
'Now, Kylie! Now, Shazza and Shane!
On, Skipper! On, Bazza and Wayne!
Park up on that water tank. Grab a quick drink,
I'll scoot down the gum tree. Be back in a wink!'
So up to the tank those six boomers flew,
With the Ute full of toys, and Santa Claus too.
He slid down the gum tree and jumped to the ground,
Then in through the window he sprang with a bound.
He had bright sunburned cheeks and a milky white beard.
A jolly old joker was how he appeared.
He wore red stubby shorts and old thongs on his feet,
And a hat of deep crimson as shade from the heat.
His eyes - bright as opals - Oh! How they twinkled!
And, like a goanna, his skin was quite wrinkled!
His shirt was stretched over a round bulging belly
Which shook when he moved, like a plate full of jelly.
A fat stack of prezzies he flung from his back,
And he looked like a swaggie unfastening his pack.
He spoke not a word, but bent down on one knee,
To position our goodies beneath the yule tree.
Surfboard and footy-ball shapes for us two.
And for Dad, tongs to use on the new barbeque.
A mysterious package he left for our Mum,
Then he turned and he winked and he held up his thumb;
He strolled out on deck and his 'roos came on cue;
Flung his sack in the back and prepared to shoot through.
He bellowed out loud as they swooped past the gates-
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYONE
and goodonya, MATES!
A late arrival. Well, it wouldn't have been if I hadn't thrown out the newspaper it was published in.
(We'll resume normal programming soon.)
Are you somehow eavesdropping on our morning conversations??? (Ie: should we buy ice cream or not? Am I allowed any even if he is currently supposedly sugar-free? Etc)
joanne said:
Are you somehow eavesdropping on our morning conversations???
Not unless you're talking on the ham bands at the same time.
Let me just say that I identify with the red-suited gentleman, although his beard is a little fuller than mine at the moment.
joanne said:
ETA: lost post
Reminds me of -
"They shall not grow old, as we that are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning
We will remember them."
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
And the days of auld lang syne?
Short answer: NO
This is the winning shot in the 2022 photo competition organised by an Australian farming group. (Search for #AgDayAU on social media if you'd like to see more.)
That is one very happy-looking doggo!
Yahooyahoo, the Lang family are among Australia’s most prominent old mining companies, with his daughter Gina R being Australia’s richest woman.
pic is a very clever pun in several ways.
yahooyahoo said:
marksierra said:
I really don't like that song.
I’m sorry the song isn’t a happy-memory one for you.
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Too late!