Menopause? (yay, such fun!)

Late 40s. period always super-regular at 26 days. In my entire life, I can count on one hand the times it was late and that was by 2-3 days at most. Only recent change I've noticed is that over past year periods seemed maybe a little heavier and on a few occasions, out of ordinary bad cramping lasting briefly.

Well, 3 weeks ago, bad pain about a week before period due lasting a few hours. And now I'm around 12 days overdue. (not pregnant and I have a doc appointment scheduled for Fri) 

But just wondering- does it just stop coming like this? I had expected something more gradual! Am I know in for a year(s) of never knowing when or if my period is coming??!?! Or does this sound more like something is wrong/medical issue? I'm freaking out a bit.

(My mother had a hysterectomy young so no way to compare her experience).

Insight appreciated!

Early 40's and my period just stopped coming suddenly and never returned.  After 1.5 years without a period you are considered in early menopause, per my dr.  I consider it a blessing. 

I'm your age. The past two years I've noticed shorter cycles, at 25-27 days instead of 28. About six months ago I had an 18 day cycle, but that hasn't happened since. I've read that it can be more frequent for a while (body trying to trick you into one last baby), but then get less frequent. Anyway, what you describe sounds similar to a friend of mine, and her doctor wasn't concerned.

this is reassuring thank you. I'll be a bit anxious until I see the doc Friday but this calms me a bit. I had no idea it could just stop abruptly, never to be seen again! I would have said a proper goodbye last month lol 

Oakland2, if it is truly not coming again, rejoicing is in order! But if it's going to be this annoying limbo where you're 13 again never knowing when it's coming, not quite rejoicing yet! We go on beach vacation shortly and the standard timing was perfect. Now I've got to pack for the worst case!

I also noticed shorter cycles (and lasting a shorter time, too) for about 18 months before they stopped. That was annoying, but I didn't have much in the way of hot flashes or night sweats. Actually, it was the only time in my life that I wasn't cold at night! Didn't notice more cramping than usual, or any other changes. After about a year and a half, it just stopped.

I've had shorter cycles (two weeks, WTF) and longer ones (6-8 weeks) since hitting perimenopause.  I'm told this can last anywhere from 2-10 years.  Not looking forward to that.

Oh wait until the fun things like surprise super-heavy periods... Unlikely you are done for good. Hot flashes were pretty bad too, but all in all, I've been through worse things in my life.

Mine left for about 8 months then returned, so don't throw confetti just yet.

Oh, and your memory...say buh bye for a while. I'm told it does comes back. Still waiting...

I'm waiting too.   Wait, what am I waiting for again?

TMI alert

marylago said:

Oh wait until the fun things like surprise super-heavy periods...

Yeah, like going through an overnight maxi pad every one to two hours for two days, and then wanting to smack someone upside the head when they claim the average period is only two tablespoons and it just *seems* like it is more than that.  Though I'm lucky, some women get their periods for seven days straight when they go into perimenopause.  At least I just have two days of hell and then it's done with.

FYI:  A normal pad or tampon holds about 5mls of blood.  A super holds about 10mls.

Oooh, such fun!

boomie said:

Mine left for about 8 months then returned, so don't throw confetti just yet.

Mines been quite heavy the past year (at least compared to my previous experience) so I guess that was a sign. Didn't give it too much thought. I'm always hot in any weather so don't expect much will change there. It just seems so weird that it just stops. Seems like there should be some sad little final sign. 

marylago said:

Oh wait until the fun things like surprise super-heavy periods... Unlikely you are done for good. Hot flashes were pretty bad too, but all in all, I've been through worse things in my life.

I don't think it stopped, conandrob. Just that you are skipping a cycle or something.

maybe. But sounds like just stopping isn't completely unheard of either.

So, if it's that late do you think that means it'll skip completely or will I wake up first day on a gorgeous beach put on my new white bathing suit and start cursing?!? 

boomie,

Good one.

My last 2 were 6 months apart, and then it was done. But I had gone through very heavy periods in my mid thirties and my periods were always 7-8 days. The last two were 3 days and light. And maybe for a year before they were much lighter.

Mine stopped when I was 45 for about 6 months.  Then it came back for about a year once every 2 or 3  months.  Now, it's been gone exactly a year, and since I've started getting hot flashes and night sweats, I'm guessing I'm done for good.  Your doctor can run a hormone test and tell you if you are menopausal.

yeah, I'm going to ask for a hormone panel. And yikes, gerryl, I'll bet you were glad to be done with that-sounds sucky. 

Maybe I'll be a menopause "star" and it's gone for good without any bad symptoms. I need something to excel at it. Let's hope it's this.

it varies, some people stop for months and start up again.  you can ask about birth control to regulate the cycle..not sure how willing a doc will be to prescribe under the circumstances...or if it will work

jmitw said:

it varies, some people stop for months and start up again.  you can ask about birth control to regulate the cycle..not sure how willing a doc will be to prescribe under the circumstances...or if it will work

I did this, and as far as regulating the cycle it did work. However, I asked for a specific BC pill that I had used in the past with no ill side effects (Ortho Tri-Cyclen Lo - norgestimate/ethinyl estradiol), but the midwife insisted on giving me a different one (Loestrin 24 fe - norethindrone acetate/ethinyl estradiol/) and I ended up with acne so bad that I was actually in pain even when not touching my face, I was waking up in morning and my chin would be throbbing.  I'm talking extremely bad cysts that were deep.  It was horrible, you don't even want to know how bad it looked.  I tried to wait it out for three months in the hopes that my body would adjust.  This was also the time that I had the hideous pain near my hip that the cause was never discovered.  At the three month mark I went in for a BP check up (routine when starting a new BC) and my BP had risen dramatically (also something I never experienced on Ortho Tri-Cyclen Lo) and the midwife made me stop the BC for fear of a stroke and was convinced that I would need to go on blood pressure medication (apparently it didn't occur to her that the BC could be the cause of the high BP, she was just worried that high BP and BC together raised the risk of blood clots and stroke).  After stopping the loestrin my horrible and painful acne cleared up, and the lingering twinges from the previous lower abdominal pain went away, and my BP is back to where my GP is happy again. 

This isn't to scare anyone from trying BC to manage perimenopause symptoms, but instead to warn you that if you had a BC that you used successfully in the past, then insist on getting that same one again unless your care provider gives you a valid reason (not just "I prefer to prescribe this one").  Or if you try one and have horrible side effects, ask for try a different one.  I really feel that if I had put my foot down on receiving Tri-Cyclen Lo I don't think I would have had the acne, BP, and pain issues.  I had other issues with this same midwife (won't get into them here) so I think her stubbornness was more due to personality than having a medically valid reason for wanting to prescribe the different birth control.

Most BC pills are combination, and while most have estradiol in them, there are different types of progestin used in the pills, and one may work well for you, while another may leave you with horrible symptoms.  And it is also true that a pill that works well for one person may give a different person horrible side effects.  There is no one "best" pill, but there may be one that is best for you.

even without the story, I'm not going back on BC pills. Gave them up years ago and was glad to be free of the side effects. So far, I have no symptoms. Just no period. Even if I have a few years of uncertainty around when it's coming, that seems a reasonable thing to deal with ( not tons of fun but certainly not the end of the world)

You very well may not be done yet.  My last two or three were many months apart.

I'm just so envious how young you are to have this conversation.... I only stopped in Oct last year (aged 60) because of the hysteroscopy! Remember I was doubtful that would work, because of the endo issues? Absolutely no recurrences or twinges, nothing to think about at all. Can't believe it's been so long! 

Speaking of endo, there's new research - just announced this week - linking newly discovered genes to the disease. 

my mom was regular until she turned 60, so I was pretty worried when mine stopped at 45, and now at 48, has not reappeared for a year.  My mom had 4 kids throughout her 20's, so maybe she had more eggs to release.  

the idea of having your period until age 60 actually makes me want to cry. Sorry, Joanne! 

I was sort of ok about it until the last year (because of the pain and heaviness/length). There comes a time when enough is just enough!

The ridiculous part is, I was apparently healthy enough to have a baby if I'd wanted...   I don't know how women my age or older have their first; I just couldn't find the strength or patience!

Oh and Campbell29, my clients often tell me that they also ran late or their mothers/sisters/aunts did. It's more common than we know, just as endo is much more common than we realise.  It's bizarre that we just accept these silly statistics handed out, instead of talking amongst ourselves and working it out.

Good news is, very little by way of weird side effects - almost no temperature/sweating oddness, except once it starts, it won't stop. (Either heat or cold) I'm more susceptible to not sleeping for several nights - but that seems to be genetic and possibly migraine related. My mum, sister and brother all have the same pattern around the same ages. 

I was reading a weird article last night that 80% of US women report hot flashes while only 20% of women in Japan do. They don't have a good theory why. Wonder where Australia fits in?

The Jean Hailes Foundation website would have the info - I'd check for you, but I'm trying to wind down and get to bed...it's almost 2:30am here... (oops. I get up at 5:30am)